Top 10 Athletes with Legal Trouble in the 2000s
Feb 5th
10: Portland ‘Jail’ Blazers
For a few years in the early part of the decade it seemed like every month someone from Portland was being arrested for something.
- Damon Stoudamire was arrested multiple times for hanging out with his green friend.
- Qyntel Woods, a harbinger of things to come for athletes arrested in connection with dogfighting
- Ruben Patterson, registered sex offender
- Rasheed Wallace, Portland experienced his technical foul years and an arrest for possession in 2002
- Zach Randolph, broke Ruben Patterson’s eye socket following a fight during practice and picked up an arrest
9 Marion Jones
After the 2000 Summer Olympics, Marion Jones had it all. She had won 5 medals (3 gold, 2 bronze) to become the first female track and field athlete to win five medals in a single Olympics. Her face and image and were perfect for endorsements and it seemed her career was heading nowhere but up.
There were whispers but no one wanted to listen until Victor Conte dropped a bombshell during an interview with infamous ABC journalist Martin Bashir. Conte admitted to supplying Jones with steroids and around that same time, her ex-husband CJ Hunter (who was disqualified from the 2000 Olympics for failing 4 drug tests) told a federal grand jury she had been using steroids.
Jones would later make a memorable public apology, forfeit her Olympic medals and end up in bankruptcy court.
8 Barry Bonds
I’m not getting lazy but let’s be honest … constructing a time line of Barry Bonds and his legal wrangling with the government would be the length of a Harry Potter novel. I’ll make this short and sweet … Indicted in November 2007 on four counts of perjury and one count of obstruction of justice which won’t be going to trial anytime soon after a number of legal maneuvers by both sides.
7 Maurice Clarrett
2002 was a great year for Maurice Clarrett. He helped Ohio State to a 14-0 record and scored the game winning touchdown in the second overtime of the national championship game against Miami. On top of the world … then … slowly … but surely …
2003 – Suspended by Ohio State for the year after he was accused of filing a false police report claiming $10,000 worth of clothes, music and electronics were stolen from him. (He would later plead guilty to a lesser charge)
Clarrett would later sue to be included in the 2004 NFL draft but was unsuccessful
He then showed up to the 2005 NFL combine where he ran the 40 between 4.7 to 4.8 and was labeled “Slow Mo.” Much to everyone’s surprise he was drafted by the Denver Broncos in the 3rd round (#101 overall). Between Clarrett and Denver’s next pick (#200) were a bunch of no name guys like Marion Barber III, Darren Sproles, Brandon Jacobs, Kyle Orton, Bo Scaife and Trent Cole. Clarett never played a single down and was waived a month after signing a four year deal.
2006 – January 1, Police announce they are looking for Clarrett in regards to two armed robberies. He turns himself in the next day and was released on $50,000 bond and entered a plea of not guilty. Days before his trial was set to start, Clarrett was arrested following a police chase that ended after Clarrett’s SUV hit a spike strip.
“After Clarett drove over a police spike strip, the chase ended in a nearby restaurant parking lot. Police said they were forced to secure a cloth around Clarett’s mouth after he allegedly spit at the officers and called them “n*ggers” during the arrest. According to Columbus Police Sgt. Mike Woods, the officers discovered a katana, a loaded AK-47 variant and two other loaded handguns in his vehicle along with an open bottle of Grey Goose vodka.”
Clarrett then took a plea bargain and was sentenced to 7 1/2 years in jail. He now writes a blog from prison
6 Plaxico Burress
Two years in jail for shooting yourself in the leg. Priceless.
5 Donte Stallworth
What do you do when you sign a 7-year $35 million contract? If you answered drunkenly run over and kill a construction worker with your Bentley on Saturday morning after a night of heavy drinking … you are correct. To top it off he spent 24-days in jail and was suspended by the NFL for the season (don’t punish the guy too hard!)
4 Jim Leyritz
The one man you want in a clutch situation is the one man you don’t want behind the wheel. Leyritz was known for his clutch home runs but the late 2000s his reputation changed considerably. It started in 2006 when he admitted to using amphetamines during his baseball career as early as 1990.
Three days after Christmas in 2007, Leyritz was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving and vehicular homicide after striking a vehicle and killing the driver , 30-year-old mother of two Fredia Veitch (who tests would later reveal was intoxicated). Two samples collected from Leyritz hours after the crash showed a BAC of 0.14 and 0.13.
While awaiting trial, Leyritz was arrested again in July 2009 following a domestic violence complaint.
The trial was scheduled for late 2009 but was delayed following the release of a video that shows the accident occurred earlier than reported.
Leyritz recently spoke to ESPN about the accident and you can view the piece here.
3 Pac Man Jones
No need for long winded explanations. Let’s cut to the chase.
July 14, 2005 – Arrested following an altercation at a night club where he threw a tantrum while waiting in line for valet. He received probation but it was extended after Jones failed to keep in contact with his probation officer.
March 23, 2006 – Charged with marijuana possession in Fayetteville, Georgia. Charges were later dismissed.
August 25, 2006 – Arrested for public intoxication and disorderly conduct after Jones reportedly spat on a woman while claiming she stole his wallet. Jones received six months probation.
October 26, 2006 – Cited for misdemeanor assault after spitting in a woman’s face during a private party in Nashville.
February 19, 2007 – Jones and Nelly (not Don Nelson) went to a strip club and began to shower the stage with hundreds of $1 bills aka “making it rain.” The dancers began to collect the money and Jones apparently became enraged when one of the dancers began taking the money without his permission. He allegedly grabbed her by her hair and slammed her head on the stage (that’s not even allowed in MMA). A security guard intervened and Jones then allegedly threatened the guard’s life.
The club owner claims a person from Jones’ entourage returned with a gun and fired into a crowd, damaging equipment and hitting three people, including the security guard involved in the earlier skirmish. The guard was shot twice, and one victim, former professional wrestler Tommy Urbanski was paralyzed from the waist down. Jones maintains that he did not know the shooter, although the club’s owner insists that Jones did. On March 26, 2007, police recommended the district attorney charge Jones with one count of felony coercion as well as one misdemeanor count of battery and one misdemeanor count of threat to life.
On June 20, 2007, the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department and Clark County District Attorney’s office announced that Jones would face two felony charges stemming from the strip club melee. However Jones accepted a plea deal five months later and pleaded no contest to one misdemeanor charge of conspiracy to commit disorderly conduct. He was given a suspended prison sentence of one year, probation, and ordered to perform 200 hours of community service.
A lawsuit has since been filed against Jones by the family of Urbanski.
May 7, 2007 – Jones was stopped for driving 79 in a 55 mph zone in a vehicle that had been previously seized in a drug arrest.
June 18, 2007 – Jones was sought for questioning but not as a suspect in an Atlanta strip club shooting.
October 8, 2008 – Involved in an altercation with his bodyguard, no charges were filed
2 Michael Vick and Marcus Vick
“Ron Mexico” was involved in a number of questionable incidents during the decade but he is best known for his involvement in dog fighting operating fights under the name Bad News Kennelz.
In April 2007 a search of Vick’s property in Virginia resulted in the seizure of 70 dogs some of which showed signs of injury. (Interesting note, it was alleged as early as 2001 that Vick was involved in dogfighting). The public was outraged after details of the case became public including allegations of extreme torture. If you kill someone Stallworth style, you only get 24 days in Jail … but God forbid you have dogs fighting each other. Vick gave in after his fellow defendants agreed to plea deals and entered a guilty plea on August 20, 2007 where he received a 23-month sentence later that year.
Vick’s arrest allowed various celebrities to offer (hilarious but) a variety of defenses:
Stephon Marbury called dogfighting a sport and compared it to hunting and said that we don’t react the same when other animals die.
Roy Jones Jr. stated, “really two dogs fighting can happen in anyone’s backyard or on the street. It happened in my backyard, two of my dogs fought and one died.”
Clinton Portis stated, “I don’t know if he was fighting dogs or not, but it’s his property, it’s his dog. If that’s what he wants to do, do it. I think people should mind their business.”
Deion Sanders stated, “Why are we indicting him? Was he the ringleader? Is he the big fish? Or is there someone else? The fights allegedly occurred at a property that he purchased for a family member. They apparently found carcasses on the property, but I must ask you again, is he the ringleader? This situation reminds me of a scene in the movie New Jack City when drug dealer Nino Brown is on the witness stand and eloquently says, ‘This thing is bigger than me.’ Are we using Vick to get to the ringleader? Are we using him to bring an end to dogfighting in the United States? The only thing I can gather from this situation is that we’re using Vick.”
Vick would later return to the NFL with the Eagles.
His brother Marcus hasn’t been so fortunate following numerous legal incidents that ended his college career and marred his attempts at playing professionally.
1 OJ Simpson
Why is OJ number 1? Personal bias? Anger over the murder trial? No. It’s because he wrote a book called “If I Did It.”
On the night of September 13, 2007 OJ was apparently retrieving some memorabilia that belonged to him at the Palace Station Hotel in Las Vegas. No he didn’t meet some good Samaritan that contacted him on Craigslist and said “Hey OJ, you in Vegas? I found some old trophies of yours, come up to my room and get them.”
Rather this was the break down the door, draw guns and forcefully remove items type of event. Smart. As an added bonus two accomplices turned state and agree to testify against him. This case didn’t require CSI and Simpson was arrested 3 days later and convicted on all 12 criminal counts against him in October 2008.
Fast forward to December 5, 2008 where OJ was sentenced to 33 years (9 minimum). 33 is a symbolic number as the families of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman were awarded $33 million in the civil trial verdict.
Honorable Mentions
Rae Carruth
Carruth would have easily topped our list except for the fact that the murder of his pregnant girlfriend occurred in November 1999. His girlfriend was following him home after a movie when Carruth slowed his car and a second vehicle pulled up and fired into her car. Cherica Adams later died from her injuries but her unborn son was saved via emergency cesarean section. Her son has had medical problems as a result of the incident. Carruth was sentenced to 18 to 24 years for his conspiracy to commit murder and other charges and is projected for release in late 2018 (which is way too soon).
Ken Caminiti
This is more of a sad story than anything else. Caminiti struggled with addiction throughout his adult life and unlike Josh Hamilton, his story doesn’t have a happy ending. His fall from 1996 National League MVP to the scorn of the baseball world (for admitting steroid use during his MVP year and claiming PEDs were an epidemic) was bad enough … but Caminiti’s final destination was the fatal grasp of drug addiction.
State to State Redistribution
Jan 29th
Guest post and graphic by Johann Lall
I made this I made this map to show the reality of the federal government’s “wealth redistribution”.
The map/chart displays the ratio of federal dollars spent in a state to dollars collected in taxes. All federal spending is included. That is why, for example, Hawai’i gets $1.44 per $1 taxed– the state has a small population and is important militarily. Likewise, as the nation’s capital, the function of Washington DC is government, not industry, agriculture, or service, hence the $5.05 to $1 ratio.
Note that Texas is the only red state that gives more than it receives.
Of course all this redistribution isn’t bad and happens for a reason, but it’s worth noting, considering the political rhetoric about redistribution and socialism.
The reality of the federal government's "wealth redistribution".
Rod Blagojevich thinks he is Blacker than Barack Obama
Jan 11th
Former IL Gov Rod Blagojevich
Rod Blagojevich had an amazing 2009. He was impeached from the governorship of Illinois then made his now famous and cringe-worthy Letterman appearance. His hair was about the only thing keeping him famous in a year full of political scandals and honestly there are only so many hair jokes you can do before it gets old.
In his latest attempt at desperately trying to get publicity for his appearance on the new season of Celebrity Apprentice, he’s now targeting fellow Democrat Barack Obama in a new interview set to appear in Esquire’s February issue. The former governor who is currently awaiting trial on corruption charges is now saying where among other things he contends that coming from a working class family makes him ‘blacker’ than Barack Obama. (Fun Fact: Seven Illinois governors have been arrested, indicted or jailed on criminal charges.)
So back to our regularly scheduled personal train wreck, Blagojevich starts by taking aim at Obama’s public speaking.
“What the (expletive)? Everything he’s saying’s on the teleprompter.”
Wow … Rod two words for you … old news. How many times have we heard/seen Obama teleprompter jokes. Now that isn’t newsworthy but he then goes on to say …
“I’m blacker than Barack Obama. I shined shoes. I grew up in a five-room apartment. My father had a little laundromat in a black community not far from where we lived,” Blagojevich said. “I saw it all growing up.”
I wish I could lock Rod Blagojevich in a room with Ice Cube and see him say that. I understand he is trying to connect his lower class upbringing with an innate understanding of what its like to be black but I just don’t see it. Thankfully the interviewer avoided the trap of asking for an explanation or what he thought about Snap music and the OJ verdict.
In America, we have a media system (this blog included) that loves to take and republish these kinds of idiotic comments and as long as Rod continues to put out toxic waste, we’ll continue to swim in it.
February 2009: In Review
Dec 30th
1
- The Steelers defeat the Cardinals in Super Bowl 43 (XLIII) 27 to 23. The game is highlighted by great plays from wide receivers with Santonio Holmes making an iconic touchdown catch to cap the Steelers late comeback. Cable subscribers in Tucson have the game interrupted by an oral sex scene from a pornographic movie leading to numerous complaints.
2
- England continues to deal with the heaviest snowfall that country has seen since 1991
- Obama warns that more banks are likely to fail as losses mount
3
- California begins issuing IOUs to cover expenses after it goes broke.
- Australia announces a $42 billion stimulus plan and lowers interest rates to 3.25 percent
4
- Panasonic announces it will close 27 plants and cut 15,000 jobs
- Hamas police raid a United Nations warehouse and seize items intended for Palestinian civilians
5
- Michael Phelps is suspended from competition for three months after a photo showing him smoking marijuana appears on the internet
- China declares a national emergency following prolonged droughts
6
- The United States lost 598,000 jobs in January and unemployment rises to 7.6 percent
- Atryn, the first drug made from genetically engineered animals is approved by the FDA.
7
- ‘Black Saturday’ The state of Victoria records more than 400 individual fires that eventually burn 1.1 million acres of land and lead to 173 deaths. 3,500 structures are destroyed and damage estimates are put at up to $1.5 billion.
9
- Nissan announces 20,000 layoffs while France provides a 6.5 billion euro bailout for its auto industry
- Alex Rodriguez admits to using performance enhancing drugs between 2001 and 2003 while playing for the Texas Rangers. His admission came two days after reports surfaced that he tested positive for anabolic steroids in 2003.
10
- UBS announces 15,000 layoffs after posting a loss of $19.7 billion francs in 2008
- General Motors announces 10,000 layoffs and additional pay cuts
11
- Two satellites collide in orbit spreading debris and raising concerns over future incidences due to increasing numbers of satellites.
12
- Colgan Air Flight 3407 crashes near Buffalo killing all 49 passengers and crew onboard with one person killed on the ground. Among the dead are 9/11 widow and activist Beverly Eckert and Alison des Forges a human rights activist and expert on the Rwandan genocide. Initial reports indicated ice as the main factor leading to the crash but it was learned that inadequate training and crew fatigue may have played a role in the events that led up to the crash.
- That same day, the NTSB concludes that a bird strike with a flock of Canadian geese led to the ditching of US Airways flight 1549 in the Hudson River
- Pioneer announces it will leave the television market and cut 10,000 jobs.
13
- Congress approves the $787 billion American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009 (commonly known as the stimulus bill/plan). As of 10/30/2009 roughly seven percent of projects funded by the bill were completed while roughly 38 percent of projects had yet to be started. The government claims the stimulus saved or created 640,000 jobs but the effectiveness of the program continues to be debated.
14
- Japan completes the first topographic map of the moon
16
- The Pirate Bay criminal/civil trial begins in Stockholm with authorities alleging the site promoted copyright infringement. The defendants are later found guilty and ordered to serve one-year in prison and pay a fine of roughly $3.5 million USD. The defendants appeal their sentence and additional proceedings are scheduled to begin in the summer of 2010.
17
- Pres. Obama approves the deployment of 12,000 additional troops to Aghanistan. Later in the year even more troops are committed to the area to support the ongoing stabilization efforts.
- California announces it will lay off 20,000 government employees.
- The SEC charges Allen Stanford with fraud and he is served two days later when he is located in Virginia. Later the SEC’s complaint is amended and Stanford is accused of operating a massive Ponzi scheme. Stanford is later arrested in June and hospitalized in September after a reported fight with an inmate.
18
- UBS AG agrees to $780 million in fines and restitution to settle accusations that it created and administered Swiss tax shelters for wealthy Americans.
- General Motors announces it plans to lay off 47,000 people by the end of 2009.
19
- The FBI serves a complaint on behalf of the SEC to accused ponzi scheme operator Allen Stanford after locating him in Virginia.
20
- SAAB files for bankruptcy protection a day after General Motors states that it may provide the troubled subsidiary $400 million.
- Benjamin Netanyahu is selected by Shimon Peres to form the next government
- New York AG Andrew Cuomo subpoenas current Bank of America CEO Kenneth Lewis regarding the acquisition of Merrill Lynch.
21
- Up to 120,000 people march in Dublin to protest the government’s response to the growing financial crisis.
22
- Slumdog Millionaire wins 8 Academy Awards including Best Picture. Sean Penn and Kate Winslett take home Best Actor and Best Actress
- The infamous Abu Ghraib prison reopens as Baghdad Central Prison
- 73 coal miners are killed after an explosion in China
- Australia holds a national day of mourning for victims of the bushfires that swept through the state of Victoria. At one point, as many as 400 separate fires were confirmed to be burning on the same day.
23
- The Dow Jones Industrial Average and S&P 500 drop to their lowest levels since 1997
24
- Ireland’s stock exchange closes at its lowest level since 1995
25
- Turkish Airlines Flight 1951 comes up short of the runway and lands tail first at Amsterdam’s Schilpol Airport killing 9 people including all three pilots. An investigation reveals that the plane’s airspeed dropped 40 knots just before landing as a result of incorrect throttle settings/operation.
- Iran tests its first Nuclear power plant at Bushehr
- Japanese exports drop 45.7 percent between January 2008 and January 2009
26
- The Rocky Mountain News publishes its last edition after 80 years leaving the Denver Post as the city’s only remaining mass circulation daily newspaper
- The US government allows photos of soldiers coffins to be published
- Royal Bank of Scotland reports a $24.1 billion pound loss in 2008
- General Motors chairman Rick Wagoner meets with Obama’s auto task force to request government intervention. That same day, the company reports a fourth quarter loss of $9.6 billion.
27
-Pres. Obama announces that most troops will be withdrawn from Iraq by August 2010 but up to 50,000 troops will remain in the country until the end of 2011 to protect US interests and advise Iraqi troops
- The federal government increases its stake in Citigroup to 36 percent
- It’s announced that US GDP fell 6.2 percent in the final quarter of 2008
- Fox renews The Simpsons for two more seasons making it the longest running primetime television series in history
28
- In response to scandals, China passes the Food Safety Law to introduce new oversight and increase punishments for businesses found to be producing/selling substandard food
- Gov. Schwarzenegger declares a state of emergency in California following severe drought
Deaths
Blossom Dearie, Jazz singer and pianist
Eluana Englaro, Italian woman who was in a persistent vegetative state and became the focus of a major Italian court battle over euthanasia. Her situation was analogous to the Terri Schiavo case.
Erick Lee Purkhiser (Lux Interior), founding member of the garage punk band The Cramps
Hugh Leonard, Irish playwright, novelist and screenwriter
Joe Rodgers, former US Ambassador to France
Larry Miller, businessman, owner of the Utah Jazz
Lukas Foss, composer and professor
Philip Jose Farmer, Novelist
Sheng-yen, Buddhist monk and teacher of Chan/Zen Buddhism, Founder of Dharma Drum Mountain
Willem Johan Kolff, pioneer in dialysis and artificial organs
January 2009: In Review
Dec 21st
Events:
1
- Oscar Grant is shot while being detained by BART officers following a fight at the Fruitvale station. Grant was taken to a hospital and died seven hours later. Officer Johannes Mehserle was charged with murder and resigned his position. Reactions to shooting were fueled by multiple videos uploaded to YouTube. Mehserle still awaits trial and a $25-million wrongful death lawsuit was filed on behalf of Grant’s family.
- An Israeli airstrike kills senior Hamas leader Nizar Rayan
- Slovakia adopts the Euro
- Gazprom halts delivery of natural gas to the Ukraine after price negotiations fail
2
- Kilinochchi, the defacto capitol of the Tamil Tigers is captured
3
- The IDF begins a ground offensive in Gaza that leads to the deaths of more than 1,000 Palestinians
4
- Bill Richardson withdraws his nomination for Commerce Secretary under the weight of a federal investigation concerning improper business dealings. Federal prosecutors would later drop the investigation in August.
5
- Minnesota certifies Al Franken as the winner of the 2008 Senate election. Franken’s opponent Norm Coleman would file an appeal the next day to contest the election and Coleman’s appeals would later reach Minnesota’s Supreme Court before he conceded the election on June 30 after his challenge was rejected by the court.
7
- Congressional budget office projects a record $1.2 trillion deficit and forecasts the recession to continue throughout the year
8
- The Bank of England cuts interest rates to the lowest level in 315 years of operation
- The UN Security Council (with the US abstaining) adopts Resolution 1860 calling for a cease fire between Israel and Hamas
9
- The Illinois House of Representatives votes 114-1 to impeach Gov. Rod Blagojevich. He is then tried before the Senate where he is later removed from office following a 59-0 vote.
12
- The Indonesian Ferry Teratai Prima sinks near Sulawesi killing 230 people
13
- Carol Bartz is announced as the new CEO of Yahoo!
- Citigroup and Morgan Stanley agree to combine their brokerages
14
- Apple CEO Steve Jobs announces a six month leave of absence
15
- US Airways Flight 1549 ditches in the Hudson River following a bird strike that leads to a loss of power in both engines. All 155 passengers and crew survive survive.
16
- Conficker infects more than 8 million computers
- Palestinian death toll from Gaza War is reported to be more than 1,000 people
17
- Israel declares a ceasefire to begin on Jan. 18th but will keep forces in the area
- North Korea claims to have weaponized nearly 31 kilograms of plutonium which would be enough to create four to five nuclear warheads.
18
- The Arizona Cardinals and Pittsburgh Steelers win their conference championship games and will meet in Super Bowl XLIII
19
- The Palestinian National Authority reports 1300 deaths, 5400 injuries and $1.9 billion USD in property damage from the attacks. It is important to note these figures are by no means exact.
20
- Barack Obama is inaugurated as the 44th President of The United States. China Central Television would later edit portions of Obama’s speech when it was rebroadcast the next day.
- The Israel Defense Force completes its withdrawal from Gaza
21
- Hillary Clinton confirmed as Secretary of State
- Toyota passes General Motors as the world’s largest automaker
22
- Obama announces GITMO will be closed within a year and officially bans torture
- Microsoft announces 5,000 layoffs as demand for PCs wains during the recession
- General Motors receives a second loan of $5.4 billion
23
- The United Kingdom officially enters a recession
- Kirsten Gillibrand is appointed to fill Hillary Clinton’s vacant Senate seat
- The number of worldwide unique internet users passes one billion in December 2008
26
- Timothy Geithner is confirmed as Secretary of the Treasury
- Iceland’s coalition government collapses in the wake of the country’s ongoing financial scandal
27
- Hedge fund manager Arthur Nadel is arrested and charged with securities fraud. Nadel had claimed impressive returns on client investments but it was ultimately determined his trading led to an overall net loss.
28
- Snowstorms paralyze the midwest United States. 19 people die and power is cut to more than 600,000 homes
- The House passes the $787 billion American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009 commonly known as the stimulus package.
- Boeing announces 10,000 layoffs
29
- The Illinois State Senate votes to remove Rod Blagojevich and Lt. Gov. Pat Quinn is sworn in to finish his term
30
- Michael Steele becomes the first African-American chairman of the RNC
- The State Department announces it will not renew Blackwater Worldwide’s (now Xe Services LLC) contract to provide services in Iraq. A report later claims Blackwater employees were working without a license until as recently as September 2009.
31
- More than 100 people are killed in Molo, Kenya when an oil spill from an overturned truck ignites. The deaths were the result of people attempting to capture spilled oil for personal use.
Deaths:
Helen Suzman anti-apartheid activist
Claiborne Pell, six-term senator from Rhode Island, Pell Grant is named after him
Griffin Bell, Attorney General during the Carter Administration
Lasantha Wickrematunge, Sri Lankan journalist and anti-government activist, assassinated
Ricardo Montalban, actor whose career spanned seven decades
Andrew Wyeth American artist
Novelist John Updike who was famous for his Rabbit series that chronicled the life of main character Rabbit Angstrom.
Former Alabama governor Harold Hunt. Hunt was the first Republican governor of Alabama since Reconstruction
2009 What Were You Thinking Award: Worst Media Blog Entry
Dec 17th
2009 was full of thoughtless commentary and while it was tough to go through all of the various media blogs and find a winner, we have found that winner.
The 2009 What Were You Thinking Award: Worst Media Blog Entry goes to “Palin will run in ‘12 on more retardation platform” by Erik Sean Nelson of The Huffington Post.
Now in all fairness The Huffington Post is a diverse publication that writes on a variety of subjects not limited to politics. Erik Sean Nelson apparently works in their comedy department and if you look at his posts, you’ll see they are mostly benign Onion-esque entries but his post (since removed) on July 3, 2009 was way outside the lines … to the point where even a galvanized Palin hater would object.
On that day Sarah Palin announced her resignation from her position as Governor of Alaska and to capitalize on the day’s events, Nelson decided to post his now infamous article:
In Sarah Palin’s resignation announcement she complained about the treatment of her son Trig who always teaches her life lessons. She said that the “world needs more Trigs, not fewer.” That’s a presidential campaign promise we can all get behind. She will be the first politician to actually try to increase the population of retarded people. To me, it’s kinda like saying the world needs more cancer patients because they teach us such personal lessons.
Her first act as President: To introduce a Pre-K lunch buffet that includes lead paint chips. Sort of a Large HEAD-START Program.
She will then encourage women to hold off on pregnancies until their 40’s just to mix up some chromosomes.
She now is in favor of abortion only in case of diploid birth.
Her policies will increase jobs because Wal-Mart is building new stores each day and someone has to be the greeter.
This will lead to smaller government because fewer Americans will have the cognitive ability to hold a government job
Queue conservative caps lock email blogosphere anger …
Besides the fact that the article isn’t funny … it’s quite a low blow. Nelson was apparently inundated with hate mail and the article was pulled a little while later and he would later issue an apology. What’s even worse is that his apology features the oddly worded line “I received some emails from the loved ones of the retarded” … ouch … proofread.
So then what happened to him. You’d imagine someone would skew him with a pitchfork or post his address online … nope … thankfully people kept a level head about the whole thing … except the Huffington Post which still allows him to publish work as of 12/2/2009.
Texas Governor’s Race Loses 2 Candidates
Dec 16th
Kinky Friedman (now running for Texas Commissioner of Agriculture)
Kinky Friedman was never going to be a contender in the 2010 Texas Gubernatorial race. With the emergence of Bill White and silky smooth Farouk Shami, there simply wasn’t enough room in the Democratic race to support a candidate … disliked by Texas Democrats.
Friedman ran as an independent in 2006 and many Democrats feel he took away much needed votes from Chris Bell (even then he still would have lost). His run this year was like Ralph Nader running for the Democratic presidential nomination but now that he’s running for Texas Commissioner of Agriculture … I think Texas Democrats might be a little more forgiving.
Larry Kilgore
Larry Kilgore makes Rick Perry look like Keith Olbermann.
Kilgore, dressed in starched blue jeans and a cowboy hat, drew some murmurs of disapproval when he launched into a rant against the U.S.
“I hate that flag up there,” Kilgore said pointing to the American flag flying over the Capitol. “I hate the United States government. … They’re an evil, corrupt government. They need to go. Sovereignty is not good enough. Secession is what we need!”
“We hate the United States!,” he said later in the speech. (SOURCE)
Kilgore has now endorsed Debra Medina … another secessionist.
Democrats (announced):
Bill White
Farouk “Silky Smooth” Shami
Republicans (announced):
Rick Perry
Kay Bailey Hutchison
Debra Medina
Can We Just Pass Something? Anything?
Dec 16th
Single payer option … gone
Medicare expansion … gone
Any idea what we’re actually keeping in this bill … gone
I like many Americans have grown tired of two things: The cost of health care and the continual battle over it. I just have one wish this Christmas and that wish is that something is finally passed.
I don’t care what we pass, in fact if someone just scribbles random lines on paper and draws a happy face and calls it the Healthcare Reform Act of 2009 … I’m perfectly content with signing that into law. Just put something in front of Obama to sign.
Alex Rodriguez Made $62,977.10 per Strikeout in 2009
Dec 12th
In 2009, Alex Rodriguez finally did what Karl Malone never accomplished, winning a championship while admitting steroid use (not sure if that is a bonus). Winning gets you a lot of love and a little more forgiveness but if he had come up short yet again, there would be a thousand posts just like this one…
In 2009 had a base salary of $33,000,000.
Stats
Games 124
At Bats 444
Runs 78
Hits 127
Doubles 17
Triples 1
Home Runs 30
Walks 80
Strikeouts 97
Final averages: .286/.402/.532
To calculate what he made for each of these categories we’ll take the number of plate appearances and divide it by his base salary:
33,000,000 divided by 524 = $62,977.10 per plate appearance. That means that whether he got a walk or home run or strikeout, he made almost $63 thousand by just stepping into the batter’s box.
Now if you take that and multiply it by the average number of plate appearances per game (4.23) … A-Rod made $266,393.13 for every game he played in 2009 (not including postseason). Now let’s say that the length of an average baseball game in 2009 (I don’t know the exact number) was 3 hours. That means that A-Rod put in 372 hours of salaried work for the Yankees at a rate of $88709.62/hour.
The following chart breaks down where his salary went in 2009:
Click for Larger Image
Things that Died in 2009
Dec 14th
Posted by admin in Social Commentary
No comments
Its the time of year when major news outlets begin publishing their lists of who passed away during the year and for the most part, the lists tend to be a mix and match of the following names:
Bea Arthur
David Carradine
Walter Cronkite
Dom DeLuise
Farrah Fawcett
Adam Goldstein (DJAM)
John Hughes
Michael Jackson
Billy Mays
Ed McMahon
Steve McNair
Ricardo Montalban
Natasha Richardson
Patrick Swayze
But some things died in 2009 that aren’t necessarily celebrities, including:
AIG – Yeah, AIG was DOA in 2008 but when it was revealed in March 2009 that the company was planning to pay out $165 million in executive retention bonuses and additional compensation, let’s just say that everyone on both sides of the aisle went crazy. AIG employees got the full fury of all caps lock hate mail, death threats and awesome quotes from politicians including these classics:
Even Ben Bernanke jumped into the mosh pit:
Car Brands Owned by GM – See below
Hummer (now owned by STHIMC)
Pontiac 1926 – 4/27/2009
Saab (maybe, sale to Koenigsegg group collapsed in late November)
Saturn 1990 – 2009
Christopher Dodd’s credibility - 2009 was not the best year for the Connecticut senator. Throughout the year he was dogged by allegations of a favorable loan from credit crisis darling Countrywide (a Senate ethics panel later found no evidence his loan was ‘preferential’). In addition he was dogged by allegations related to Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac and had to explain a lot about a little Irish cottage.
Dubai – Sure, everyone associated with the emirate wants you to believe that everything is going to be fine and that the recent financial disclosure won’t affect everyday business. However Abu Dhabi is now beginning to overtake the city as the world’s new exotic, over the top destination for wealthy unskilled workers and impoverished skilled workers.
Sen. John Ensign’s political career – 2009 was not a good year to be married to a Republican politician. Ensign had an affair and when confronted about it, he decided to do everything possible to keep it secret. He gave his mistress’ husband a lucrative job at a political consulting firm and his family made a payment of 96k. But that wasn’t enough and Ensign publicly admitted to having an affair after Hampton’s intermediaries claimed to have asked for exorbitant cash and compensation. Later on it was revealed that Oklahoma senator Tom Coburn attempted to broker a settlement to keep it secret but that it never materialized.
David Letterman’s image – Sure it wasn’t like he had much of an image outside of his show but after admitting he had encounters with multiple staffers, its hard to look at him the same way. Not to mention the fact that he took a beating from the conservative blogosphere who had been angered earlier in the year by a joke regarding knocking up a member of Palin’s family.
Market Value of Top Athletes – First Michael Phelps got in trouble in early 2009 following the publication of a photo showing him taking a bong hit. I don’t care what he does in his personal time but Kellogg’s disagreed and didn’t renew their contract. Then of course Tiger Wood’s is the man no advertiser wants to touch right now and has already been dropped from Gillette and Accenture.
Recession - Only on a political level. Americans are still reeling from job losses, evaporating wealth and a lack of credit.
Gov. Mark Sanford’s political career - From June 18 to June 24, no one knew where Mark Sanford was. Apparently he was on a hike in the Appalachian mountains but it was later discovered that he had flown to Argentina to see his mistress (and didn’t even call home for Father’s Day). Rather than resign, Sanford decided to stay in office and ruin the credibility of South Carolina’s political system.