Social Commentary
Lindsay Lohan Attempts a Lawsuit
Mar 9th
When your film career is going nowhere, I guess that means its time to file a lawsuit and hope that it somehow works.
In this case Lindsay Lohan is asking for $100 million and an injunction against an E-Trade baby ad which uses the name Lindsay to describe one of the characters. Blow-han is suing the company claiming that the use of the name Lindsay/Lindsey was chosen specifically to reference her and that in turn she’s owed a lot of money.
Laughing already? Me too. But let’s at least examine the stupidity of it.
First the commercial:
Lindsay “84 minutes in jail” Lohan believes that the milkaholic reference was chosen to parody her struggles with substance abuse and that when factored with the characters name it is 100% without a doubt referencing her.
I don’t know whether Lindsay or her lawyer thought of filing this joke (maybe they are trying to get some bad press out ahead of Lohan’s role in Machete) but I think E-Trade’s legal team is probably having a good laugh and is already sending emails throughout the office joking about Blow-han’s half-assed attempt at a lawsuit.
Lohan’s lawyer even shoots herself in the foot when trying to describe this hail mary of a case:
“Many celebrities are known by one name only, and E-Trade is using that knowledge to profit,” Lohan’s lawyer, Stephanie Ovadia, said in a statement to the New York Post. “They’re using her name as a parody of her life. Why didn’t they use the name Susan? This is a subliminal message. Everybody’s talking about it and saying it’s Lindsay Lohan.”
(Note to lawyers, don’t use the word parody in quotes about these kinds of lawsuits because people might think of parody/fair use when in actuality they need to think of unlawful use of name or likeness.)
First establishing Lindsay as being on the same level of Prince or Lebron is going to be difficult. Under what standard can you legally establish a name with being the property of a specific person especially when the name is very common and no last name is used?
Also to answer her lawyer’s question, if E-Trade had used Susan then they would obviously be referencing addiction specialist Susan Shapiro and her attempt to stop smoking.
Furthermore ’subliminal messaging’ has been the basis of a number of unsuccessful lawsuits against the music industry but let’s move on.
If her lawyer (worst web site ever btw) is arguing that the connection is actually the milk-a-holic reference when taken in context with the name then she is indirectly acknowledging that the general public already associates “Lindsay” and “substance abuse” with Lindsay Lohan (which is true according to Google if you type in “Lindsay drug addict”). With that in mind, advertisers should use care when choosing the names of substance abusers.
The law states that a person’s full name doesn’t have to be used in order to constitute unlawful use of their image but considering how common Lindsay/Lindsey is … good luck. Furthermore if her lawyer is attempting to claim that the suit is based upon the ‘general consensus’ establishing that is going to be near impossible.
This might have been easier to establish in this case if the E-Trade commercial showed the baby getting pulled over for DUI, making out with Samantha Ronson or the baby’s face was covered in white powder (or all three at once). But it didn’t so let’s move on.
Grey Group which created the ad argues:
… Grey Group, which produced the “milkaholic” commercial, said that they “just used a popular baby name that happened to be the name of someone on the account team.”
Seems much more reasonable to me than someone on their team saying “I hate Lindsay Lohan, let’s unlawfully use the substance abuse component of her public image to portray her during one of our baby ads which will subsequently result in a lawsuit for our client.”
Now let’s assume that somehow this lawsuit moves forward … how can one establish damages? $100 million seems like a number chosen to scare people rather than a representative figure for damages.
But then again, Lindsay Lohan scares me.
Things that Died in 2009
Dec 14th
Its the time of year when major news outlets begin publishing their lists of who passed away during the year and for the most part, the lists tend to be a mix and match of the following names:
Bea Arthur
David Carradine
Walter Cronkite
Dom DeLuise
Farrah Fawcett
Adam Goldstein (DJAM)
John Hughes
Michael Jackson
Billy Mays
Ed McMahon
Steve McNair
Ricardo Montalban
Natasha Richardson
Patrick Swayze
But some things died in 2009 that aren’t necessarily celebrities, including:
AIG – Yeah, AIG was DOA in 2008 but when it was revealed in March 2009 that the company was planning to pay out $165 million in executive retention bonuses and additional compensation, let’s just say that everyone on both sides of the aisle went crazy. AIG employees got the full fury of all caps lock hate mail, death threats and awesome quotes from politicians including these classics:
“I would suggest the first thing that would make me feel a little bit better toward them if they’d follow the Japanese example and come before the American people and take that deep bow and say, I’m sorry, and then either do one of two things: resign or go commit suicide.” – Sen. Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa)
“It’s hard to understand how derivative traders at AIG warranted any bonuses, much less $165 million in extra pay. How do they justify this outrage to the taxpayers who are keeping the company afloat?”
- Pres. Barack Obama
Even Ben Bernanke jumped into the mosh pit:
“It makes me angry. I slammed the phone more than a few times on discussing AIG.”
Car Brands Owned by GM – See below
Hummer (now owned by STHIMC)
Pontiac 1926 – 4/27/2009
Saab (maybe, sale to Koenigsegg group collapsed in late November)
Saturn 1990 – 2009
Christopher Dodd’s credibility - 2009 was not the best year for the Connecticut senator. Throughout the year he was dogged by allegations of a favorable loan from credit crisis darling Countrywide (a Senate ethics panel later found no evidence his loan was ‘preferential’). In addition he was dogged by allegations related to Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac and had to explain a lot about a little Irish cottage.
Dubai – Sure, everyone associated with the emirate wants you to believe that everything is going to be fine and that the recent financial disclosure won’t affect everyday business. However Abu Dhabi is now beginning to overtake the city as the world’s new exotic, over the top destination for wealthy unskilled workers and impoverished skilled workers.
Sen. John Ensign’s political career – 2009 was not a good year to be married to a Republican politician. Ensign had an affair and when confronted about it, he decided to do everything possible to keep it secret. He gave his mistress’ husband a lucrative job at a political consulting firm and his family made a payment of 96k. But that wasn’t enough and Ensign publicly admitted to having an affair after Hampton’s intermediaries claimed to have asked for exorbitant cash and compensation. Later on it was revealed that Oklahoma senator Tom Coburn attempted to broker a settlement to keep it secret but that it never materialized.
David Letterman’s image – Sure it wasn’t like he had much of an image outside of his show but after admitting he had encounters with multiple staffers, its hard to look at him the same way. Not to mention the fact that he took a beating from the conservative blogosphere who had been angered earlier in the year by a joke regarding knocking up a member of Palin’s family.
Market Value of Top Athletes – First Michael Phelps got in trouble in early 2009 following the publication of a photo showing him taking a bong hit. I don’t care what he does in his personal time but Kellogg’s disagreed and didn’t renew their contract. Then of course Tiger Wood’s is the man no advertiser wants to touch right now and has already been dropped from Gillette and Accenture.
Recession - Only on a political level. Americans are still reeling from job losses, evaporating wealth and a lack of credit.
Gov. Mark Sanford’s political career - From June 18 to June 24, no one knew where Mark Sanford was. Apparently he was on a hike in the Appalachian mountains but it was later discovered that he had flown to Argentina to see his mistress (and didn’t even call home for Father’s Day). Rather than resign, Sanford decided to stay in office and ruin the credibility of South Carolina’s political system.
Yahoo Comment of the Day 5/14
May 14th
Posted by admin in Social Commentary
No comments
(Since Yahoo has started allowing readers to comment on articles, the site has turned into a hub of stupidity.)
Mortgages: Strategic Defaults are on the Rise
Patrick posted:
“Odumba has a plan alright to give your house away are make you lose it by Cap & Trade… Obams is a socialist people we can not get this guy out of office soon enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All this socialist talk is coming from the mouths of him & his supporters, socilaist media is runned by the leftest, Odumba thinks you have to much information now , so hes is going to give you the news he thinks you want to hear. Going down a ver dangerous path…………….”
What makes this sad: 174 votes for against 433 votes against